I remember the very first thing I ever wrote on my own.
It was called "The End of Me" and it was an emo expose' on my terrible sophomore relationships.
You see, I was a smaller and less well versed Matthew McCounaghey from Dazed and Confused my early years of high school. So essentially I spent more time changing girlfriends than I did in actual relationships.
Almost a sweet lou.
High five if you got the movie reference!
But I'm afraid that that particular song is forever lost to the world of myspace. It would be retrievable if I didn't think I was hilarious in high school, and made my password virtually un-guessable. It is probably has something cheesy to do with my ex, but the options there are endless.
Sometimes I wish I could go back to high school and tell myself something intelligent that would help me in the future.
Like, "Hey, cut your hair. You look like an emo Ellen Degeneres."
Or, "Hey, Hawthorne Heights SUCKS. Stop pretending they are a legitimate form of music."
Or, "Okay look. There is a young child on this earth named Justin Bieber. Find him and punch him in the throat."
Jk. I wouldn't punch a child. Unless it stole my wallet.
However, in all seriousness I don't think I would change a thing in my life. I seem to be a magnet for writing material. By writing material I mean: bad relationships, losing my wallet, hitting an immigrant with my car, helping my ex ex move, and playing nerdy video games.
Yep, I'm a professional. Don't try any of that at home. You may die.
It is funny though that somehow amidst all my strange life occurrences writing has been one of the very few stable things. Which as you may have noticed by my writing, I treat my life like Taylor Swift. If you don't want to be mentioned in it you best not date me, befriend me, or doing anything remotely funny out of the corner of my eye. Yeah, I see you over there. *begins scribbling on napkin*
So now that I have thoroughly isolated myself, I'm off to Vegas!
Prepare for a slew of random tweets and posts, and the potential for me to come back with a tat on my face.
Muahahaha!
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